When someone you hardly know dies

I learned through FB that a cousin of mine, who I have not seen in decades, has passed away. In the way that families need to be truthful, but don't want to acknowledge stuff that's really no one else's business, I had heard that she was mentally ill for most of her adult life, and didn't live independently.

Such a tragedy.

The cousin who shared the information on FB had a really nice way of putting it: "God takes those like her directly to his side. She is finally at peace."

Her death reminds me that to some extent, it is a roll of the dice that makes it so we continue down our chosen path in life. That illness and accidents happen to people sometimes in a random way, and there is no guarantee.

I was thinking just yesterday how I have been skirting the edges of contentment again. I love when this happens, when things seem like they are humming along and I'm doing my job as a parent, being productive at work, doing some creative stuff. It's a good feeling indeed. I imagine it's a response, but I had a dream last night that Mr W was in his bed and said he kept hearing noises. I went to the back door (which he can't see when he's in bed), and someone grabbed me from behind. In reality, bestest barky watchdog Sally prevents this from happening, so I am not worried about that particular scenario. It was clearly (in my mind anyway) my primitive lizard brain saying something like, "you think you're feeling good right now? There are so many wonderfully scary things to worry about that could happen to you!" I sent her (my lizard brain is named Alexandria) out for coffee and she'll be back some time later.