Home Again

I am back home after my trip to CA for work and a spot of play. It was a good trip. I gave a good talk, and am hopeful that the extra three months of work that my boss is trying to finagle will come through. Or, that I will get a good job before then. I had my classic anxiety dream last night, wherein I am back working at the nature center in Toledo that I worked at (happily) before moving to CO. In the dream, and it is always the same theme, I am back working there, and there is a group of kids coming, SOON, and I need to present part of the day's programing to them without any preparation.

In this dream, though, there were more details, and it was one of the those dreams that seemed to last most of the night. I remember saying, as I have before in this dream, "I sometimes dream that I'm back here to work". Wacky.

Anyway, here are a few shots from the trip. This was much more of a professional/trade show type conference than the academic ones I am used to. This is one of the workers there, and behind her, you can just glimpse the exhibit hall. I had no idea there were so many products to kill mosquitoes with. Must be pretty lucrative, too, because those displays were really nice.

It rained the first day I was there, to my surprise. Here's a genuine west coast snail, trying to get out of the rain by coming up on the sidewalk. Its shell was about an inch across.

I really did laugh out loud when I saw the sign on this Mickey statue. Sure, put up a totally climbable statue and tell everyone to stay off. 

We went to dinner one night at a New Orleans-themed restaurant. I had shrimp and grits and it was really good and really salty. The piano was totally covered with rhinestones, which reflected white in the picture, but you can kind of see on the sides of it.

Around the same area of the restaurant, there was a shopping district and I found this nice purple-flowered shrub. I have no idea what it is.

On to Palm Springs. After the conference, I took a shuttle to the airport, rented a car, and drove to see my SIL, who was visiting family in Palm Springs. I won't bore you with the details of the trip, but everything they say about California traffic is true. There are just so many people packed into that space. Here's a gas station that actually still offers full-serve gas - but it's going to cost you.

One of the botanically (and gastronomically) awesome things about southern CA is that there are citrus trees grown as ornamentals in people's yards. We picked these from the tree in the front yard, and there were also lemons and oranges about. I love that kind of stuff. And they were good, too.

This is the view out the back door of where I stayed. Just lovely. They plant annuals in the winter that we plant in the summer, and then come through as it gets hot and pull them out to leave the desert landscaping to get through those hot summers. It was a really nice visit.

I planted some seeds before I left, and they have germinated. I need to get out today and turn my compost pile again. I'd like to get the soil prepped in one part of my bookcase raised beds, so I can plant peas. It's fun to be thinking about gardening again. I got the job application submitted for the job I really want, and want to send in a couple more resumes to companies that don't have anything at the moment, but might, blah, blah, blah. It'll work out.

Thoughts and possible news

My presentation went really well yesterday. It was a relief to have it over, and the whole day's worth of talks (a symposium on the bugs I work with) was interesting. A couple of near-snoozers, but overall good stuff. Note to people giving presentations: Leave your 30 row tables at home and just give us the good stuff, OK?

Last night, my boss and I went out to dinner with some collaborators, and they really liked the stuff I've done so far with their mosquitoes. There's talk of more collaboration, and me training one of them in our techniques. And talk of how to get as much done as I can before leaving at the end of July. Today I sat in on another symposium on the outbreak of West Nile disease in AZ last year, which a group from the CDC responded to and then gave talks on today.

As I listened to the talks, I thought to myself, "I'm going to miss these people; I'm going to miss this." Erg, kinda sad about it. My friend from work moved to WI to start a new job, and I miss her, too.

Well, tonight was the banquet. Man, the food was so good! I'm still full, 3 hours later. Anyway, My boss told me tonight there is talk about these collaborators putting up money to keep me on for an additional three months past the end of July. It's not a full reprieve, but they're trying, and maybe they can find some more money in the meantime to keep me another year. It feels good to see they'd like to see me stay.

A short dispatch from Anaheim

Well, I did it again. Chose a hotel that is a little too far from the conference. Not horrible, but a 12 minute walk, and I don't want to walk it after about 7 pm. I should just take taxis, there are plenty.

Can someone explain the appeal of Disney to me without using the word magic? Or using it and defining it somehow? I just don't get it. I haven't seen much of the park, as the hotel where the conference is is on the edge. We can walk through "Disney Downtown" which has shops and food, and then yesterday I went through a slice of the park on my way to catch a shuttle (which ended up being as long of a walk as going from my hotel). It's been chilly here, and it looks like they don't have everything open as they might if it were warmer.

Anyway, the conference is pretty good. It's got more of a trade show feel to it, and people are dressed up more here than at the academic conferences I'm used to. On a bright note, I saw my boss get an award from the Association whose conference this is, and that was a nice surprise. He hadn't let on that he was getting it. The talks have been OK. My world of population genetics is an infinitesimal part of the scene and that's fine. My talk is ready to go, I'll run through it one more time before I leave this morning. We've got 20 minutes, and if a ramble through it, it's 19 minutes. Perfect.

I had a dream the other night. I went into a room and there were two dead trees in pots. Small trees, like citrus. The smaller pot was sitting in the dirt of the larger pot, but they both had sand in them (which doesn't hold water, right?). So I was presented with these things, and my first inclination was to water them, which I did, trying to revive them, but I realized they were too far gone, and that with the sand, the water wouldn't help anyway. I'm pretty sure this has to do with past relationships.

OK, up and at 'em!!

Off to see Mickey

I'm going to Anaheim, CA for a conference soon. I've got my computer and camera, so I'll try to post some pictures. Since work will pay for me to check a bag, by golly I will. I'm also going big time and bringing my sweater knitting project to work on at the conference - that seems so decadent!

One weird thing is that the weather (think southern CA in spring) is supposed to be rainy and low-60's. Blech. The conference is at one of the hotels at Disneyland, and I'm staying at another hotel close by. I'll try to get over to the park once, although I admit the Disney stuff doesn't hold much magic for me.

It's a small world after all....

It's so me

Maybe I'll wear this to my first interview, which hasn't happened yet, but will!

From Cafe Press

Words

I attend the Unitarian Universalist church here in town. I joined about four years ago partly to give myself a new community to be involved in and partly for Mr W to get some spiritual context in his life. To each his own on the religious front, but one thing I really like about this church is its pastor and his sermons. I love leaving feeling like I've learned something. Last week he had a list of words that are hard to translate directly into English, but nevertheless have meaning.  I liked the list and Marc's descriptions so much, I'm sharing them here.

"uffda"--OOF-da--Swedish, exclamation--A word of sympathy for someone else in pain--"Ouch
for you"--You hit your thumb with a hammer--You're getting ready to move--You're being
consumed by Terry, the lovable but dangerous Great White Shark-- We shout "Uffda!"

"Rasa"--Sanskrit, noun--The mood, feeling, or sentiment evoked by a work of art, some other
entity, or an intense event--The essence of the emotion I feel in response to the essence
embedded in my experience--Marcel Proust eats a special French cookie and it triggers in him
intense memories of his past--and a really, really long novel--the essence of the cookie yields for
Proust the essence of his life's journey. "Rasa" is both a quality which inheres in an object or
event and also the inner feeling state evoked.

"yugen"--YOO-gehn (hard "g")--Japanese, noun--An awareness of the universe that
engenders emotional responses too deep and mysterious for words--We have the sense of, a
feeling for, the profundity and mystery in our lives and also in the world. Like "rasa," "yugen"
describes inner feelings more than the event or object that arouses such feelings.

"h`ozh'q"--HOE-shk--Navajo, noun--The beauty of life and the world, as seen and created by
a person--One's wealth and riches are one's stories and song, one's poems and paintings, the
various things of beauty one has created or embodied in one's life. Beauty is the full gestalt of
object, creator, and viewer. We walk and live in beauty; we end our days in beauty. "It is
finished in beauty."

"ostranenie"--ohsh-truh-NYEHN-yay--Russian, verb--To "defamiliarize" the world--In art,
literature, religion, rite or ritual, the intention to explode the ordinary, whether in an object, in
perception, or in experience, so as to revolutionize meaning. Make strange objects that are
familiar--Picasso, Emily Dickinson, William Blake, Charlie Sheen, Gertrude Stein, Andy Warhol and
the giant can of tomato soup. The exploration of light in the paintings of the Impressionists
might be seen as one example of this effort. Jesus in his parables uses reversal, irony,
unexpected metaphors and analogies to allow us to see and feel anew. In Zen this practice goes
on constantly, which might make you eventually desire to go on a long run, watch TV, or eat
crackers/ice cream/cookies-- whatever you prefer. But will cookies ever taste the same after
Zen? "I think not."

Workin' it

Networking has been on my mind of late. I've told several people that I'm being let go (it feels nicer than saying "laid off") and to please spread the word and let me know if they hear of any leads. And you know what? I know more people than I realized I did. It's because I went to school here, obviously, but it still felt good that I've been able to even have people to mention my plight to. OK, maybe it's not a plight yet.

Yesterday, I was picking up Mr W from his we-don't-have-school-today day care thing, and ran into a woman who has a son about Mr W's age and we were students together in Biology department. She got the job at the Botanic Gardens that I applied for an didn't get an interview for. I am happy for her, as I didn't want the commute, and she no doubt was better qualified for it anyway. But she mentioned that she had thought of me the other day because they were getting a list of people together who had the skills to work on short term projects doing lab work that I can do. We exchanged email addresses, and I sent her a resume as well. I don't want that kind of piecemeal sort of work, but it's always good to have one's credentials on file.

And yesterday, too. I got an email from a person who I consider a mentor, who was on my graduate committee and has helped me with data analyses since I got out of school. He had a person who was trying to use a program that I used and wanted to know if I could give him any pointers to make it work. I put in my two cents' worth and then had the opportunity to share the news that I was going to be let go, blah blah blah.

And with the job I'm really wanting right now, the Biologist one that pays really well and is a FTE job with the government, well, I've found a couple of people who know people there as well. Of all things, my SIL in South Carolina used to work with a woman who now works for the same government agency, in the same building, but a different department, as where this job is located. And I emailed the x because he's a government contractor, and he suggested I email this guy who is also in the same building as the job is located in, and who I just happened to see the other day when Mr W and I were at this hands-on science thing.

It's wacky.

But it makes me feel like I'm doing something towards getting the next job, and that makes me feel calmer. I'm not feeling so urgently like I need to go back to school, but I need to make that decision in the next month or so because the application deadline is May 15th and I'd need time to assemble letters of recommendation, and get official transcripts sent, etc.

We're going to a parade today, the St. Patrick's day parade downtown. I'll take pictures.

My Resume, Wordled

If you click on the picture, it will take you to the Wordle page and you can see it bigger-fied.  I took out the personal info and left my "action words".

This and That and That

Not too much news to report, but I thought I'd check in. Work has sort of settled back into a new normal, where we all realize that we need to wrap stuff up, but there's lots to do. I'm supposed to go to a conference in a couple of weeks, and started to work on my talk yesterday. I was going through older presentations looking for a logo to put in my talk, and realized that I've already given a longer version of this talk, so I really just need to pare it down to about 15 minutes. I even had picked the same template that I had used previously; how's that for predictable? My only question that I need to send to the contracting company I work for is, "if the government shuts down next week, do I still get to go to the conference?" The fee is paid for, but they buy refundable airline tickets, and I haven't paid for my room yet, so I really don't know.

I have been looking for a job, and actually found a couple to apply for. A couple that are (in my mind anyway) really good fits, not ones that I would pick out of desperation (although that time may come). One's a fed job, in town, and it's a couple of pay grades above what I make now. I'd qualify for the lower of the two pay grades offered (which is still great and awesome) but I was fantasizing yesterday about what I would do with the money offered by the higher pay grade, which would almost double my salary. Buy a car with cash? Contribute money to all the places doing good work around town? Put money in Mr W's college account? My retirement? Ha! There's no chance of me qualifying for the higher grade, but I'd be thrilled THRILLED to get in they system at the lower one. Oh, what's the job? It's got an analysis part where I'd read reports and distill the info into sensible bits, and then a public outreach part. It's so me.

The other one is something called a Science Teaching Fellow. This one's in Boulder, which is about an hour away, but they want someone to work with the professors who teach undergrad Evolutionary Biology, Ecology, and other stuff up my alley. I need to re-read it to see if there's a learning component for the Fellow, or if they want someone who already knows more what they're doing. It's a one year thing, renewable for up to three years.

So those are good leads.

I've been dutifully turning my compost pile, in hopes that I'll be able to use it to amend my soil before I plant things this year. So I'm out there with my watering can full of hot water a couple of times a week, and I think I see progress. The soil in my raised beds got hard and dry last year, despite me buying a soil/compost mix from the landscaping company. It's funny, after reading some of the great blogs that I follow that operate at larger and much larger scales than I do, my little plots seem so tiny. But I'm just trying to feed me and Mr W (and whatever green beans the dog ends up getting).

Can I say that I am, without fail, amazed at this seasonal cycle that I am part of? Every year when the garden is done, I'm done. Last year, I had food to eat beyond the garden's existence, but there was a point at which I said to myself, "This does not hold my interest anymore". And it rests, and I forget about it, and I start to knit again, and we have the holidays, and then it comes and gets me again. The desire to pick out seeds and plants and plan and scheme. Gardening and knitting kind of pass each other and bump knuckles on the way, one going in, the other going out of my scope of interest.

But not so fast, knitting. I've got a sweater that's about 25% done that I need to finish off before it gets warm.

Promise

Well, this dreadful photo (I took it with my phone, put it on Facebook and copied it from there) shows where my mind is of late. Saturday, I went out with dear friend D and her friend K, and we had drinks at this hip little place downtown. Drinks, as in I had two drinks. And I was hungover on Sunday. Note to self: the cost of the second drink is too high. Enjoy the one and drink water, OK? Anyway, we had a really fun time that also included dessert.

February was pretty darn mild, and we expect to have more winter before it's really spring, but it's OK to start seeds around the middle/end of March, for planting around the beginning of May. It used to be Mother's Day, but people jump the gun a bit. New this year are the mini-melons that I'm going to try to trellis, and the pickling cukes, which I will also trellis. The kid likes pickles, so we'll make some. I got a Roma-type tomato and the plant is determinate, which I'm thinking will give me one largish crop and I can can them all at once. That's the plan, anyway.

Still haven't heard anything about the teaching jobs. I've got my resume almost ready to post on several job sites, and have created saved searches that email me potential jobs once a day. I'm going to a conference in a couple of weeks, and I need to get my talk ready. It's hard to shift focus back to the job I'm still getting paid to do.

Life going on

Well, after the news that all but two of us contractors were losing our jobs, the folks from the contracting company flew out, and individual meetings were scheduled with each of us for yesterday and today to discuss "your future employment with our company". Mine's at 9:00 today.

I'm thankful that we all talk to each other, as co-workers who had their meetings yesterday described them as "five minutes of nothing".

Why, you ask?

Because Congress passed the stopgap spending dealio, so the government still doesn't have a budget for this year, so the contracting company and the CDC know that the budget will be cut drastically, but can't say for sure by how much until they pass one. I just hope they don't shut down in the midst of this, because I wouldn't get paid for that time.

As it is, I'm good until the end of July, and am now looking at that as enough advance notice to find something else. I had all but dismissed the teaching jobs as viable possibilities, as it's been a month now since they closed. But I called yesterday to see if interview candidates had been chosen, and they have not! So I consider myself still in the running, and now - go figure - the starting salary offered to do these jobs doesn't seem so unreasonable after all!

If those don't pan out, my next idea is to figure out something to live off of for a year, and complete the graduate certificate in Instructional Design at UC Denver. I'll sell the van if I have to *sniff*, but am hoping I can come up with something that I can live off of and am not above taking out a loan, but I don't want to do that either.

So, I'm actually hopeful. Everyone I talked to yesterday mentioned how there's "nothing" in town in terms of jobs for what we/they do. I feel fortunate that at least I've dipped my toes into some other pools and can pursue the teaching/education thing. Who knows? Maybe getting laid off will be the kick in the pants that lands me in education (either teaching or being support staff in the form of ID) after all.

Bummer

I'm being laid off at the end of July after all.

Boom Shakalaka

Here is my latest knitting project. It's a Cadence sweater, by Jordana Paige. If you click through to look at the pattern, you'll see that it has this really wide neckline, which initially turned me off to the pattern. But good old Ravelry shows several projects where people have cast on with smaller needles, then switched to the needles the pattern calls for when they start the chart. How clever! So I cast on with size 7's, and then switched to 10's. Too early to tell if this worked, but I think it will be OK.

Here's a close up of one of the pattern repeats. The Cadence name is apt, as I have gotten into a rhythm working around them. You might also get a sense from the pictures that this is bulky yarn. I am such a fan of bulky yarns for sweaters. This is Cascade's Ecological Wool, which is a really good deal, at $15.00 for 400+ yards of yarn. I love the look of a sweater made from DK yarn, but just don't have the time to spend with that skinny yarn. This way, I can see my progress and actually have a chance to wear this thing before it gets warm. C'mon spring, I dare you to come early!

Dog Muffins

 

I think I'm a pretty good pet owner. I take Sally to the dog park just about every day, skipping Saturdays or Sundays sometimes when we've been around the house all day anyway. She is not a working dog by any means, but repays me and Mr W by being an affectionate and good-natured dog. This picture was taken about a year ago at the dog park, and when our friend J crouched down to take the picture, Sally lunged forward. J did get out of the way and didn't get knocked over, I'm happy to report.

I got Sally after my other dog died, and wanted specifically to get a puppy, and further to get something that I knew would be really good with kids, as Mr W was six at the time. I don't remember how I first learned about Labradoodles, but everything I read suggested that would be a good choice. In fact, when I was asking questions of the woman I eventually bought Sally from, she couldn't name anything to really watch out for in their personalities, besides energy. I found Sally by searching the Denver online classifieds ("we met online"). The going price for Doodles at the time was close to $1000 and she was much less expensive, being the product of two pets instead of more papered dogs. And it's worked out great. She's a wonderful, healthy dog.

Now, the dog muffin part. On the scale of how people treat their dogs, 1 being they live outside, aren't considered part of the family and work for a living, and 10 being dogs who have their toe nails painted, get dressed in jewelry and eat exclusively people food, I'm about a 5. She's an indoor dog, and part of the fam, but she gets dog food, cheap dog treats and rawhide. At the dog park, there's a group of us who end up going at the same time each day, so we walk around together. It was one dog's birthday so her owner made dog muffins (like people muffins, but less sugar, fat and salt) for all her dog's friends. This owner has a treadmill for her dog, too. Yes, I can snicker, but there is no doubt this one shelter mutt scored big in terms of the good life. 

So, while I'm not the sort to bake treats for my dog's friends, I'm still a pretty attentive owner. I suppose the fact that the dog can't appreciate how poorly some other dogs get treated is the paradoxical outcome of being a good pet owner. I wonder about the same for Mr W. We are by no means rich, but he wants for nothing and has a lot of stuff, as do many kids of his generation. It's hard for him to get his head around how bad it is for a lot of the world by me just telling him. Indeed, I am of the mind that our place in life obligates us to do something to return the favor, and my efforts are fledgling, but we're on it.

 

Current Events

I'm just about back into my groove from being out of town. Even when I'm gone for just a few days, there always seems to be a big list of things waiting for me when I return. The night before I left, I was doing laundry, and heard the sound of water hitting the floor in the basement.  I went down to find water coming up out of the vertical pipe that drains the washer. I needed those clothes, so I put towels down and hoped for the best - the load was almost done anyway. 

Fast forward to yesterday, when the plumber comes out.  Do the pipes gurgle when I flush the toilet? No. When I take a shower? Nope. He snaked the line and determined that there was just lint blocking the part of the line between the washer and the main. Lint. Like from someone's early felting projects where she didn't use a pillow case. Ahem. Oops. Well, $90 and no harm done. I use pillowcases now, so hopefully this won't be a problem. I am thankful that previous workers put a cleanout next to the house the last time I had sewer issues.

But I was going to mention something else. I was visiting my dad in Florida last weekend, and my brothers were there as well. My dad is kind of old-school, socially and fiscally conservative. I'm kind of left-leaning. We talked a lot about current events over the weekend. A lot. And I have to say how impressed I was with the degree to which we all have been paying attention. Someone would bring up an angle on some issue, and pretty much all of us had heard about what they were talking about, or something similar. I really liked how, although we didn't agree on how to fix things, we agreed on big issues and respected each other's opinion. It made me wonder if I was spending too much time reading about current events, when I could keep up with my dad, who is retired, but I think I'm OK.

One other thing that I learned over the weekend is that my younger brother has a unique memory of past events. The birth order is my sister, my older brother and me - each a year apart - and then him, six years after me. On the one hand, we will talk of things, and he'll say, "I was too young", or "I wasn't there".  On the other, he remembered things that I had forgotten about, and in wonderful detail. I have a new appreciation for his memories. There was a snake story that I had almost forgotten, and it was fun to hear it again.

Back to it

I'm back from my weekend in Florida visiting my Dad with my brothers.  My older brother's flight got canceled, and hopefully he'll get back to MN today.  Darn that winter travel anyway.  This picture is us after we took an airboat ride.  Interesting, a little exciting (the driver had a lot of control and swung us around turns from time to time), but really loud.  They gave us head phone ear protectors to wear.

It was great to see everyone, and we began to have "the talk" with my dad.  Thankfully he's still sharp mentally, and although he has slowed down just a little, he seems to have many more years ahead of him. He showed me the list - 40 items long - of the things he had to do when he arrived at the Florida house back in December. He's so much in the do-it-yourself generation. I wish I was more like that. It seemed like he's done a good job at getting his papers in order so that we know what he wants to happen in case he gets sick.

Florida, as you might imagine, is nice. It didn't feel homey to me, though, and I'm still trying to figure out why. Where my dad lives reminds me of Tucson, with the low strip malls, palm trees and clay roofs. It feels like a place, like Tuscon, actually, where it is a substantial job to keep nature at bay so people can enjoy themselves. My strong preference is a place where air conditioning is optional, I guess.

I sometimes feel like the odd one out.  Mom and my sister are gone, and while no one excludes me or anything of the sort, I feel like there is a bond between the males of the family that I am not part of, and I guess that's a function of loss more than anything else. There is a concept in genetics called genetic drift, where, small changes that don't directly affect survival accumulate over time between individuals or populations that are separated by space. The end result isn't good or bad, it's just that you can tell there's a difference. Not that I feel like I've drifted in a way that influences how well I get along with my family, but I feel like I've had to make my way on my own without their influence because they are so far away.

My dad asks me, every time we are together, if the x and I will get back together, and this drives me crazy, despite the fact that I know he means well and has my best interests at heart. Mr W's dad has never, never ever, wavered in his desire to not be married to me, which is fine.  It makes it easier to move on, and I could never go back. I got a bit  impatient with him when it seemed like he thought I was unpaired because I wasn't looking in the right places, like church (he doesn't read this blog).

It was a great visit, and I hope to get down there every year or so.  It is always nice to see everyone. I guess seeing people who have known me my whole life gets my introspective self in high gear.

A Little Change of Scenery

I'm flying to Florida on Thursday to see my dad and brothers for a few days.  My dad's had a winter place in FL for the last 10 years and has always wanted us to visit. I'm glad we're finally getting it together to go down there, and, as dad says about himself, "I'm not getting any younger."  That may be, but he's pretty darn healthy, and I'm hoping I am the beneficiary of those genes. 

Speaking of feeling healthy, I've been doing this Spin (the bike kind, not the yarn kind) and Tone class for about 4 months now, and I feel really good about it.  We bike for about 40 minutes and then do about 15 minutes of work with hand held weights.  My arms have muscles I can see, and my backside looks better (if I may say so), too. Besides that, though, I feel stronger. I feel strong. I remember it was probably a couple of years ago and I was hiking with a friend, and going down a hill and I felt almost like I was going to fall.  It's hard to describe.  Nothing was hurt or wrong, I was just so out of shape that hiking felt like a lot of work. This is better.

Back to Florida. I was able to use miles to purchase the trip down there, and then paid for the trip home.  I was able to get direct flights, too, and I'll bring my stuff in a carry-on, so it should be pretty smooth travel, barring weather calamities. We don't see each other enough, my family and I, seeing as we're scattered across the country.  There's nothing much to be done about it, especially with my brothers and their wives.  The all have good jobs in their chosen fields and have established themselves where they live. I'll have to be content with vacations.

It's Done!

 Here's my Liesl sweater.  I had to redo one arm, so it took me a little longer than I thought it would.  But I like it!!  It fits well, and I like the way it looks.

Here it is after blocking.  I wasn't sure if it would be long enough, but it's fine.  The lace really stretched quite a bit.  Yea!  This is my next project:  Cadence.  I'm casting on with smaller needles than it calls for, so the neck isn't so big, and so far so good, but I'm only a few rows in :-)

What you really really want

Feeling better this morning about the job thing.  I had a good talk with my supervisor yesterday and we got caught up on the things projects I've been working on.  It's a good situation, where I go and do my thing and he is very hands-off. He said there will be layoffs, and that I "should be OK".  As these things go, I'll have to assume some duties of people who get laid off, so it looks like learning something about mosquito morphology is in my future.  I haven't had to learn because there's always others around to ID the bugs that way and my thing is to get their story through their DNA.  But I'll look at them in the microscope, and learn the terminology. 

This means of course, that some people are going to lose their jobs, and I can't help but feel bad for them and a little guilty that I got to stay.  Having a couple of weeks of uncertainty and "what ifs" about the prospect of losing my job tweaked me out enough to know these folks are in for a jolt. 

The flowers above are two African Violets that have decided they really like the north-facing window and I've gotten a winter time flower fix from having them around. The one on the right languished in its pot, crowded with offshoots.  I took those out and replanted them in separate pots, and this one, with a little more legroom now, has gone bonkers. 

But back to the job thing.  I pitched my idea of taking a 30% pay cut in order to go back to school and this was met with, "well, I don't know how we'd do that, and either you're here to do the work, or I can find someone else".  Not in a bad way, but my boss wants a full time person to do the work, and I respect that.  However.  The prospect of doing this other thing, the instructional design thing, is still appealing and I'm wondering if I could still pull it off. 

Hence the title of this post. Next year will likely find me in the same position, wondering if I'll be renewed.  There's also no room for advancement in my job. Even if I became and FTE, I'd still be a tech.  Most of me is OK with that, seeing that if affords me to do what I want in my off time.  But there's a nagging bit of me that wants to know how I can be satisfied with just doing that.  I could take these online courses on my own time and get the certificate while I'm working full time. I imagine most, if not all of the people doing the certificate are simultaneously working, so it's possible. I'm daunted by the fact that it's a 6 credit course per semester, which by my recollection is a full load by graduate school standards. So, I'm ruminating on this still and relieved that it looks like my job looks like it is safe for another year. 

A Little Edgy

The rumor mill continues to churn at work, and it's starting to make me a little edgy.  Nothing has actually been decided, however, and I'm going to pitch my idea of reducing hours to my boss today.  Depending on my mood and how much I let the possibilities swirl around, I can see the potential to get myself pretty worried about this.

I'll need to find out for sure if I'd qualify for unemployment benefits, because it's a contract position.  I also have to find out whether I could, if I can't stay on at the CDC, go to school while on unemployment.  This strikes me as such a no-brainer, although I don't know if it is the case.  A person who loses their job should be able to have the unemployment benefits for, I don't know a year? in order to get retrained for the next thing.  It seems like such a good investment to me.  I'll take on the burden of paying for the school, just let me have something to live on and don't make it hard for me to get health insurance, OK?

But I'll have to find out all this stuff.  The logical part of my brain gently reminds me that I don't have enough information yet. 

I thought that I'd start having trouble sleeping about all this, but I am frankly amazed how exercising three times a week makes it easy to fall (and stay) asleep. I was thinking about work stuff last night before I went to sleep and thought I'd be restless, but clunked out and slept well.  I'm a little embarrassed to say that I haven't stuck with an exercise program for this long (4 months and counting) before. I haven't lost much weight here, but damn, I feel good. It does help my outlook, and that is reinforcement to keep doing it. And I can see changes in my arms and legs that make me feel like I've got something to show for my work too.

Plan B

If you've been following the news at all lately, it seems clear that federal spending faces steep cuts.  I'm not here to go into where those cuts should or should not come from, but it looks like my particular agency is going to face some significant cuts.  I've talked with my supervisor briefly about it, and he just doesn't know anything yet. 

Lots of questions and uncertainty.  A coworker and friend has already gone on an interview in another state for a job.  I am ambivalent about what to me seems like it might be a little too proactive, since we don't know anything about our jobs yet.  However, if you had the means and chutzpah to pick up and move to a job that you wanted, was pretty secure, and paid well, would it make sense to do it?

Unless things got really bad, I'm not looking to pull up stakes and relocate anywhere if I lose my job.  But here's the thing.  I've been taking stock of my skills and it's going to be difficult to get another job like mine.  It's not like I don't have any skills, but I don't think they are all that marketable right now, and employers may not be willing to pay for the fact that I have a Ph.D., when most of what I do can be done by trained monkeys experienced BS or MS degree holders. I can write the scientific papers reasonable well, though, and yesterday I was able to give a new postdoc good advice on doing a project similar to mine, but on ticks. I know, I know, but ticks, mosquitoes and fleas is what we are all about where I work.

So I've been thinking about the Plan.  The Plan B, in case I lose my job and I don't get either of the teaching jobs I applied for, and don't want to languish on unemployment while I get less and less employable.  It calms me a lot to think about what I would do, as it's still just me, and the marrying rich thing hasn't panned out (yet!).

I'm still interested in education, with the overall big-picture goal of promoting scientific literacy as a way to make rational decisions in people's daily lives.  I'm not able to make it financially as a high school teacher, and the full college professor thing would consume my life and force me to relocate, and the community college thing is promising, but may or may not pan out either, and doesn't pay all that great.  What to do?  Learn how to help students learn better and teachers teach better.  There is a certificate program that is all online from the University of Colorado in Denver that is called "Designing e-Learning Environments".  It takes a year, and is 15 graduate credits (which I would have to of course pay for), after which I'd have the certificate and could try to get a job off of that.  The certificate also represents the first year of a two year MA program in "eLearning Design and Implementation", so there's some flexibility.

In my perfect world, I'd get renewed for another year at work, take a 25% pay cut, which would be tight, but I could still live off of, and take a year to get this certificate, which would give me a portfolio that I could show to prospective employers.  I could potentially work from home after that, which would rock, and I'd have good skills that were marketable to a variety of jobs.

This is all still inside my head and on this page, but doing so helps me feel like a Plan is in the works.

Mish mash

 

This is the lake next to the building I where I work.  My little slice of cubeville is on the 4th floor, so there is always a fabulous view. I don't mean to be snarky about being in cubeville, either. At one point, when they were moving our lab to this building, there was talk of our offices remaining in the old building, which would have been a huge pain. So I don't mind doubling up in an office cube meant to be for one person. Anyway, we had a spell of really cold weather at the beginning of the week, and as it warmed up again, into the 40's and 50's, the ice on the lake developed these fissures that now look like someone rode a snowmobile across the lake or something. It's been really cool to see how this water changes, sometimes daily, as bodies of water (even man-made like this one) are kind of rare here.

Today is a kind of gloomy Saturday, but it's warm. There's hardly any snow on the ground, either. I've got a mish mash of things to get done, and Mr W's birthday party is tonight. I need to pick up the food, and shuttle boys to and from Chuck E Cheeses. Indeed, this reminds me I'll need to vacuum out my car before hauling children.  That dog of mine is a one-dog mess generator. There will be a sleepover at Mr W's dad's house, with nerf battles and the like. The x's girlfriend's son, who is 7, is attending as well, and it has been interesting to hear second hand how these two little souls are getting along, after being thrust together. Sort of like instant step-siblings, although not formally. The dynamics are the same, with Mr W kvetching that the other kid hovers, whines, turns the TV channel too much, that kind of thing. And to think that one of my major hopes was to hook up with someone with kids so Mr W would have the chance to develop sibling relationships. I think overall it's good, but there are also times when he's quite happy to be an only child.

I am planning on going to the Denver Art Museum tomorrow.  They are having a free day today, so I'm happily going to go tomorrow and pay the entrance fee to avoid the crowds. Mr W and I went to the Denver Zoo last fall for a free day and it was, well, it was a zoo. Too many people to really enjoy the place, and I can't imagine enjoying an art museum that way. Last night was our First Friday gallery walk downtown, when many of the shops are open late, to search for a birthday present for Mr W.  My plan was to then go over to a nice little restaurant/bar/music venue and get some dinner and perhaps stay for the show, which started at 8:30.  

I really want to be able to do this sort of thing, but I didn't stay for the show. It was bluegrass, which I love to watch, but I'm just not crazy about watching that stuff by myself. I suppose you could argue I wouldn't be by myself, and I watched plenty of singletons walk in to see the show. I feel conspicuous, although I know I'm not. But, I did resist the urge to just change into my PJs after coming home from the dog park at 6, and settling in for a quiet night of knitting.  That counts for something, right?  

One thing I am doing is to sign up for a tiny bit of volunteering. The church I go to had a volunteer form (how convenient!) last week and I signed up to be in rotation for: ushering, doing laundry from the kitchen, cooking meals for folks coming out of the hospital, and something else that I can't remember. I also signed Mr W and I to help at an event for the Food Bank later this month. I say this stuff not to toot my own horn, but to I guess demonstrate to myself that I am doing something to try to meet new people and contribute something. With the gardening muse calling to me again, I really want to parlay some of that interest into something where I do some volunteering and can meet some people. There's a community garden on the way to work that needs volunteers and I'm going to start there.  

Indeed, the thought of starting to plan next year's raised beds has me rubbing my hands together with delight.  I'm going to try to get more vertical structure going this year, as those book cases aren't all that big, I realized after seeing the real estate that one zucchini plant takes up.

Ramble ramble.  OK, I'll stop this rambly post here and get on with the weekend.  Hope yours is fab.

She's back!

OK, a little late to the party, but I discovered yesterday that one of my favorite blogs is active again.  It's called Bioephemera, and it's got all sorts of Science-Art mix-em-ups.  Yippee!

Some updates and a weather report

The shake up of Mr W's evening routine, wherein I had him start to help prepare his dinner, and join me at the table to eat, has gone well.  As I expected (kids are really so darn adaptable) he fought it hard for three days, complained about it for another three, and then accepted his fate from that point on.  We are talking more, although we've also had a couple of nights where what he really wants to do is to play on the computer, and he has to do all this stuff first, like help fix dinner, eat with me, and do his homework.  I have to say this effects the mood at dinner, and making dinner its own valid thing is something I'll have to continue to work on.  But it feels good to be doing it.

The mouse wars continue.  I have snap-trapped five so far, and found one dead inside an open bag of tootsie rolls.  There's some metaphor in there about excess, but I'm not going there; it was probably an icky way to die.  I cleaned out three drawers in the kitchen.  They must be able to get in behind the cupboards and into these drawers, because the mice obviously felt pretty comfortable in there, especially in the bottom one, which I don't go into very often.  I set a trap in that one, and on the stairs, as there is still at least one around.  It/they are good at licking the peanut butter off the trap without tripping it, so I've added a piece of dog food to entice them.  I'd just like to be done with this task, though.  It's gross.

I mailed off my applications for the teaching positions that I posted about here.  In a stroke of brilliance, I asked some teachers I know to give me feedback on my teaching philosophy, and I'm so glad I asked.  So very glad, because they had good things to say that could only come from people who are currently in the field.  I felt really good about the cover letters especially.  They were only slightly different, as one of the positions was for teaching General Biology, and the other one was for teaching Botany, Genetics and other subjects I'm excited about teaching.  Not that cellular respiration doesn't grab me right there, but plants are so cool, and the world should know, you know?  But I went through and kind of gave a point-by-point as to how I met the qualifications and how I would fulfill the specific responsibilities of the position.  The deadline to submit is Friday, so it's going to be a couple/few weeks yet before I hear anything.  It'd be so cool to have an interview for either position, really.

And the weather!  I know it's been a pretty wintery winter for a lot of the country, and it actually hasn't been so much of one here.  Fall was mild and prolonged, and last weekend it was in the 50's.  But we've got this "Arctic Mass" of cold air sitting on CO right now, and it's, let me check, -6 and projected to go down to an eye-popping -18 tonight.  I didn't used to worry about this kind of thing, but now that I'm a home owner, I do.  The ductwork for my furnace is such that the unused basement room gets heat like any other room in the house.  The vent is in the ceiling, isn't easily closeable, that kind of thing.  And when it's cold like this, I suspect that having that warm air in the basement probably keeps the pipes from freezing on nights like tonight.  The kids have scored another day off from school tomorrow, so I'll be home a half day with Mr W.  His dad had him today, so I didn't have to miss work.  Brrr.

Only so many words

I feel like I have been sparse on posting the last few days, and it's because I've been completing the applications for the teaching jobs I'm interested in.  The one's focus is Botany, Genetics, Ecology and Environmental Science - totally up my alley - and I have put a lot of time and mental energy into getting the cover letter and my teaching philosophy (both have to be but one page each) right. The other position is General Biology, and is local, so I'm putting in for that one as well, but am more excited about the possibility of teaching Botany and Genetics.  It's still wacky to me that there are even two positions open.

I think I got them both to sound the way I want them to sound.  It's funny, I have to sort of suspend my fears of what would happen if I DID get the job, in order to write like I really really wanted the job.  Having the Botany/Genetics job would introduce a 40 minute (one way) commute, give me a $9,000 pay cut, and involve lots of work to get ready to teach.  On the up side, it's a 9 month position, it's a 9 month position, and it's a 9 month position.  And I'd be teaching, which I really do enjoy.

I'm glad I'm throwing my hat in the ring, and am excited about the possibilities.

Coupons

I've tried, I really have.  I know that some people clip coupons and save a good chunk of change when they go shopping.  I suspect that the avid ones actually enjoy this process.  I'm sorry to say that I don't.  The thought of maintaining a little folio of coupons fills me with dread. 

There's an organization in town called Be Local, and they put out a coupon book twice a year or so, with, obviously, coupons for goods and services from local businesses.  Last year I bought the book for $10-15 and put in in my car, where I would have it handy for all the local shopping that I try to do anyway.  I didn't use any of the coupons, and they're all expired now, as the new book is out.  Ergggg.

I was talking to a friend at the dog park yesterday.  She's very good at supporting local businesses, and volunteers pretty regularly for various events around town.  She told me she never used any of the coupons in her last book either, and that made me feel a little less bad. 

35 Minutes

That's all it took my new handyman BFF to replace the garbage disposal that had been waiting on my kitchen chair for the last *cough* three months.  Or more, I've lost count.  I used Angie's List to find another handyman, and when he was going to be out of town working on a job, he suggested this guy, who had worked for the housing authority in town and thus had lots of experience with this sort of thing.

Now, on the one hand, since it only took him 35 minutes, should I pay him for an hour's worth of work?  This though crossed my mind very briefly, but I ended up giving him an extra $10 because I was so happy to have the job done, AND I believe that a person should be paid for their expertise.  He even used a couple of small parts that he had, instead of opening up the packages possible things I'd need that I got from the hardware store.  "You can take these back to the store".  Now I'm starting to put together a project list of stuff that needs to be done around here.

It's funny, I've really gotten into the habit of not using the disposal, and instead am dutifully filling my compost pail and dumping it on the pile outside.  The best bit, though, is that replacing the disposal fixed the leak where the thing hooked into the drain line.  No more emptying out the pan under the sink after each load of dishes. 

In other news, I'm going to a wine tasting tonight, with folks from a single parents group I occasionally do things with.  There aren't really any romantic prospects there, but it's good practice for me to be out and mingling.  And there will be other people at the restaurant.  My goal is to chat with one guy that I don't know.  I hired a sitter for Mr W, and it's someone from church that I used a few years ago.  I'm trying to get Mr W's dad to switch back to the old schedule that I changed when I was dating B, but he doesn't want to.  It gets so complicated when we all have to accommodate not only the x's schedule, but the schedule of the person he is dating and HER x.  It's good, then, the Mr W has a sitter occasionally.

Mouses in My House

 

 When I went out of town last month, I originally was going to have my friend G both take Sally the dog to the kennel (a.k.a. Dog Camp) and pick her up, to avoid having to board her extra days.  I put a plastic bag with some dog food in it on my counter, so G could feed Sal and then Mr W and I would be home shortly after.  Well, that didn't work out, and we were able to pick up Sal on our own, but the food sat on the counter for a few days until I realized that about half of it was gone.  

Uh-oh.  Mice.  Again.  Most of the years that I've been in this house, I've seen a (as in just one) mouse in the fall, and I set my snap trap, kill it, and that's that.  This time, though, I think the one had babies and there's several around.  I keep the door to the back hallway closed when Mr W's not here to heat less of the house, and a couple of times in the last few days, I've opened the door to see a mouse scurrying away.

It has kind of hit a peak today, as I've seen two (maybe the same one twice) in the living room in the last hour or so, and this morning, one popped up in between the top of the stove and one of the burners, fer cryin' out loud.  No, I wasn't using the stove at the time.  It's almost comical; they see me and then it's as though they say, "Oops, she saw me!  Gotta go!"  I did catch one today behind the stove, and just set another trap after seeing the one in the living room.  The damn things are not silent, I heard them last night doing whatever it is they are doing.  I feel sort of bad using snap traps instead of live traps, but I do believe them to be humane.

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UPDATE 1-24-11, 6:24 am:  I caught three yesterday.  Two were juveniles, and one adult.  I reset the traps, we'll see if there's any more.

I have a gardening question

My raised beds had their first year of service last year, and I've got two of them, just a few feet apart.  I put zucchini, peppers (which were totally shaded out by the zukes), green beans (which the dog kept eating - I thought they jusst weren't producing) and tomatoes in one bed, and broccoli, melons, peas, lettuce and carrots in the other.

My question is, can I do another year with basically the same stuff in the same beds, or do I need to switch them every year?  I bought a soil/compost mix from a local landscape supply company to fill the boxes initially.

Your thoughts, garden people?

Some good news in Agriculture

I occasionally read the Civil Eats blog. I like their common-sense approach to talking about food issues. They had a blog post recently that talked about some good news in agriculture for a change. The link below has the whole piece, which has a lot of links, so I'll just put this main one here.

Worldwatch Report Reveals Real Agricultural Solutions

This report is on a global scale, but I liked reading it because it seems like third world problems are often treated as needing only technology to solve.

I have been starting to think about my garden again. It's still funny to me how cyclical the process is. Come October, I'm so over gardening and trying to use up what I've grown. But now, after the holidays, I'm sniffing around the gardening websites, and thinking about how I'm going to try to improve the soil in my raised beds, what to grow, etc. It's like gardening comes back to pick me up around this time of the year.

Rumor Mill

Like almost everywhere, there are budget issues where I work. There was supposed to be a big cut this fiscal year, but it wasn't as large as anticipated, so there haven't been any layoffs. To their credit, the management is pretty forthcoming as to what's going on, and it looks like it might be kind of grim in the next couple of years. Speaking only for myself, on the one hand, I'm not too surprised at the possibility of not being renewed because I have a contract position.  It's always kind of been in the background that at the end of any given year, I might not be renewed.  On the other hand, though, a lot of government contractor positions aren't like that. Mr W's dad has been in his contract position for 11 years, and there's a person at work who's had his for 10. But it helps keep it real, so to speak, in my mind, if I assume that the party might be over when July rolls around.

As you can imagine, this situation is ripe for speculation.  I was talking to someone, who had been talking to someone yesterday, and what they heard - I'll stop right here and make my point.  I'm trying not to give too much weight to this information because it's third hand, but I'm still mildly concerned.  That's how rumors work, right?  Well, the rumor was that there would be a 10% cut next year, which I think would mean we'd keep our jobs, and then a 50% cut the next year, which I'm pretty certain would mean jettisoning us contractors.  Or not, I really don't know.

I'm pleased I have some skills, but feel like I need more to be competitive.  I feel like I should do things to be more ready, should I face losing my job.  Even though I don't have any debt beside the van and my mortgage, I'm still edgy about the repercussions of losing my job and going on unemployment.  And I hate that, despite not really taking the rumor seriously, I still sort of am. 

Well, I have two teaching jobs to apply for, and I will do that this weekend.  The closing date isn't until February 4th, so I've got time.  I read on the one description, the local one, under the "Required" qualifications part, that they want 3 years of full time teaching experience.  As a requirement.  This sort of smells like they've got someone they are trying to give the job to.  For the other position, which is also a General Biology Instructor, for the same community college, just a different campus, there is no such teaching requirement, only that one has demonstrated proficiency at teaching. That one specifically mentions Botany and Genetics, so I might be more in the running for that one anyway.

I'm also going to give some thought as to what I would do if I did lose my job.  What then?

Snowshoers

We are lucky indeed to live about an hour from Rocky Mountain National Park, but I confess I don't spend a lot of time there because dogs (understandably) aren't allowed on the trails.  There's plenty of other places to hike with dogs, so that's what we do, but RMNP is still in a class by itself.  This past weekend they had a "get in free" day, and there were several snowshoe manufacturers and outfitters there with demo snowshoes for people to try. 

I thought it would be good to get Mr W out and on some snowshoes, as it's a pretty easy thing to do, and I was hoping he and I (and the dog, with her winter booties) could all go out sometime and tromp around in the snow.  So we went, and at his suggestion, took the van, which is great for this kind of thing because there's room to change boots, or clothes for that matter.  And there's the cool factor...

We snowshoed for a bit, maybe 20 minutes, because there were a lot of people on the trail.  It was enough to get an idea of whether our gear was adequate, and whether Mr W would be up for this kind of thing in the future.  Yes to both.  I'm pleased that the exercise I've been doing for the last few months seems to be paying off; I didn't get winded as easily as other folks on the trail. 

I'm going to work today, and of all government holidays, I always feel like this one in particular was given for a reason.  I feel on the one hand that I should participate in one of the MLK things going on, but on the other, it's a day to work and bank for later.  Slightly guilty, but I will work today.

Happy Birthday, Sister Kris

I refer to her as Sister Kris now out of habit.  My dad's girlfriend is named Chris, and I dated someone named Chris, so it was kind of a bookkeeping thing.  Nevertheless, today is her birthday.  She would have been 48 today.  It's going on three years now that she's gone.  I still think about giving her a call now and then like I used to, but it's not as frequent anymore.  I leaned on both she and the rest of my family pretty hard when I was going through the divorce.  She helped me a lot.

Kris was diagnosed with Stage 4 colon cancer when she was 43.  Everyone was completely blindsided by this, as no one thinks to look for it in someone so young with no family history of it.   She responded well initially to treatment, and I remember so much waiting.  Another scan.  And another scan.
She fought bravely and had her family with her when she died.  She would be so proud, so very proud of her sons, who are both in college now, and doing well academically.  She would also be proud of her husband, who shepherded the boys through, and got them off to college and the next phase of their lives. 

Having loved ones die early affects a person.  I was angry and sad and a bit lost for a long time about it, and only recently have started to ponder bigger picture things that don't take those events into account.  Not to sound preachy (I really don't want to foist any sort of strong opinion on anyone) but I get something out of a show called On Being, where the host interviews all sorts of people on the topics of "religion, faith, meaning, ethics and ideas".  I feel fortunate to have my needs met to the extent that I have the luxury to ponder these bigger questions, and I'm trying not to ever forget that.

I will have a glass of wine later, and toast my sister, and thank her for all she's done for me, and promise to honor her memory by never forgetting what she means to me.

Outrage

I feel a little sorry for Mr W.  I've made the realization that the mental and emotional energy that I use for finding a mate has a cost, and that cost is that I tend to sort of go on autopilot with the kid sometimes.  Sure, I do all the day-to-day stuff that I'm supposed to; I'm certainly not ignoring him.  However, at those times it feels like I'm not putting energy into pushing him a little bit to do new things and get more out of school, which he sees as such a drag. Now that I've gotten off the online dating, while keeping optimistic and dialing down my urgency, the kid has practically my full attention.

I also acutely felt his absence when he was with his dad for the last few days, when Congresswoman Giffords was shot, and that sweet little girl, the same age as Mr W, died.  Those events shook me up a little, and I was sad that I'm only with Mr W for half of his time.  So I wanted to feel like I'm making the most of the time that I do have with him.  Thus, I instituted sweeping changes to the evening meal protocols, which was met with outrage, OUTRAGE, I tell you, from Mr W, the very person I'm trying to nurture.

I told him that, from tonight on forward, and indefinitely, I want his help fixing his dinner, and I wanted to eat together at the table.  That's it.  You see, I fix two different meals almost all the time when I have him.  I know, I know, this is one area of parenting where I have failed miserably, but I fix him his starch-vegetable-yogurt-chocolate milk, and then I have something else, usually pulled from the freezer that I've made ahead.  It works, but it gets old.  Especially when he can be helping a little on his end.

The first night, he threw an actual tantrum, which was difficult, and took a lot of effort because he was hungry.  He literally stomped across the floor to show his displeasure, and had to go to his room and cool off.  Once we were both at the table, we..... talked a bit.  I happened to have a National Geographic on the table (yeah, that's how we roll at my house), and showed him pictures of Egyptian mummies scientists are doing DNA studies on.  I told him about getting the airline vouchers as compensation for our canceled flight, and we talked about where we could go this summer.

The second night of the new routine was met with initial refusal but then he came around and helped.  He also offered to bring in the milk that had been delivered on the porch.  It'll get easier, and although I answered his questions as to why I was punishing him like this, I ultimately had to say, "Look, you don't have to be OK with this, but you know my intention is not to punish you, but for us to talk more."  "Hmmph".  But he's coming along and I think this will be a good change for us.



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Limp, limp

I've spent my precious coffee-time this morning getting the blogs I follow from my blog to Google Reader.  There must have been an easier way, but I had to add about half of the 30 or so by hand.  I know, I know, this technology stuff will make it easier, but I usually feel like I'm limping along with it, as opposed to embracing it.  The upshot is that I'll have new posts in one place, and won't miss anything from the blogs and sites I like to follow.  That's good.

Returning the favor

Like a lot of girls, I was taught how to knit by my mom, when I was in my early teens.  My recollection is that she didn't knit much herself, but knew how to cast on, and do the basic stitches.  I may have made a scarf when I was younger, but I don't recall making anything else.  My mom didn't actually knit much either, but was working on a vest when she got sick, and a friend of theirs ended up finishing it.  So, I guess my early experience with it was glancing at best.

Fast forward to around 2007, when I'm out of school, have a full time job that doesn't require me to work outside of work, and want to develop a hobby.  I think it also may have had something to do with wanting to make a pair of socks for the guy I was dating.  I wonder if he threw those away, or kept them... Anyway, at the time, I had recently become friends with D, who is a good knitter.  A real knitter.  And I remember us meeting for coffee once, and she showed me just a couple of things, like how to decrease stitches properly for a sock, and that did it.  That gave me the oomph I needed to go ahead and consider myself a knitter and take on other projects (besides scarves!). You know how you can watch videos, or see books about something, and it just doesn't click until someone is sitting next to you and does it a couple of times?  That's how it was.

Well, yesterday I got to return the favor, and I showed my friend C some basics.  It just strikes me as ever so cool that this is how this craft is passed along.  That a skill that is both practical and an expression of creativity is often perpetuated in this way.  It was fun to see her first few tight, weird stitches turn into a declaration of "Yes, I think I've got it".  Because we all do tight weird stitches when we start anything new, and it's just practice that leads us to be better at it.  Does that sound like something I tell my kid?  It is.

Realistic Expectations

I read in the paper yesterday morning that there are not one, but two openings for Full Time Biology Faculty at the community college where I taught last year.  One is at the campus I was at, and the other is at another campus about 45 minutes away.  My first thought, was, "COOL!"  My second was, "I wonder if these are for real, or if they've already got someone picked".  There was yet another opening earlier in the fall at the third of the three campuses of this community college, and, despite being well-qualified, I didn't get an interview.

I know times are tough, and the competition is stiff, and all that.  But this is ME, and I know I'd do a fabulous job, and I want it (she pouted).  My point is that it is supremely frustrating to take the time and effort to put together a package to present your credentials for a job, only to be ignored because they've already got someone they're happy with, and they just had to go through the formality of opening the position to the public.

The upshot of already for applying for a similar job a few months ago is that my resume is up to date, and I've got a reasonably good one-page teaching philosophy already done.  The positions are a little different.  The one at my campus is pretty sparse in its description, where the "primary focus is teaching and curriculum development for Majors and nonmajors Biology".  I think that's pretty much what I was doing.  However, at the other campus, the primary focus is, "teaching and curriculum development for majors and nonmajors Biology, Ecology, Botany, Environmental Science and Genetics"

Well!  Did you nice community college people know I majored in Botany?  And that plant genetics is my thing? And that I have a PhD?  There you go.  So, I'm particularly excited about the second one, although the logistics would be a big deal.  Really, an interview for either would be validating. 

The downside to one of these positions is the pay cut I'd take.  However, I hope to figure something out to make up some of that, and it IS a 9 month position.  And I'd be teaching, which, at the risk of sounding self-important, is a way that I can see myself giving back, sending the elevator back down, that kind of thing.  The application process for both jobs doesn't close for another 3-4 weeks, so I'll get my stuff together this week and then try to forget about it.

In other news, it looks like my brothers and I will meet up with my dad in Florida next month.  He goes down there most winters, and has wanted us to come visit him for years.  This year we will manage to pull it off, over President's Day weekend.  I perused airfares on Orbitz, and for some reason (maybe the holiday?)  it was going to be $400 to fly to FL, and there was no direct flight.  The dates are set, so I was ready to just pony up the money.

Then, I had the smart idea to see if I could use some of my old Frontier frequent flier miles, and lo and behold, I used almost all of them to get a one way ticket to FL, and then I paid for the return flight for a little less than $200.  And they are both direct flights, and leaving when I want to.  Go figure.  Btw, I forgot to mention that Delta did come through and I got two $125 vouchers for future travel in compensation for Mr W's and I canceled/ delayed flight after Christmas.  So, we'll figure out some summer travel off of those.  More on that later.

Priorities

My Christmas tree is still up.  And there are dust bunnies on my floors.  There is a dish full of dirty dishes, and laundry that needs to be folded.

However, I feel like I had a very productive day yesterday.  Sort of hitting the reset button after traveling.  I had to go to work for an hour to load samples that would run all day.  Then, I hit the thrift store and found several sweaters, some workout stuff, and a few shirts - all half off!  I also spent a lot of money at Target (I was literally down to the last roll of TP - I can't remember the last time that happened!), and went to the grocery store.  Oh, and I also stopped at our local REI, to pick up a jacket I ordered, and bought Sally a set of dog booties for future snow adventures.  *Phew!*

I recharged on coffee and checked the weather forecast, seeing that we had a storm headed our way.  Hmmm, should I do household chores, or go for a hike with the dog?  The picture above shows the answer.  I love that we don't have to drive far to get on a trail and walk over a few hills.  I was going to put the booties on Sal, but figured I'd wait until we were in actual snow, although I still had to clean mud off her feet, so might start using them for wet trails as well.

And this morning, oops, it just turned into afternoon, I've been reading about the tragedy in Tucson, and finishing the body of my purple sweater.  My goal is to get one sleeve done today.  We are getting snow, although less than a foot for the next 24 hours (so they say).  Mr W would be pleased indeed to have a snow day tomorrow.  Funny thing about all that housework stuff.  It waits, patiently.  OK, I think I'm ready.

Dispair and Triumph

I wanted to share a couple of Christmas pictures from Mr W's second Christmas.  That's one of the very few perks of having divorced parents, you get multiple Christmases, and therefore potentially more loot.  To keep Mr W humble, and to give myself a laugh, I do a couple of things at Christmas.  The first is to joke about giving underwear, and then to actually give underwear.  This is met with the following:

I then put a couple of things under the tree and make Mr W work for the rest.  A kind of scavenger hunt, that I realized too late was entirely too easy this year, but I'm up for the challenge and will tweak it a bit for next year.  It starts with an envelope under the tree, and then he's got to answer clues (maybe I'll have him do math problems next year...) to get to the next clue.  This year it was stuff like, "Where would you find a washcloth to wash your face?" and "Where do you put the tupperware away when you empty the dish drainer?"  Easy peasy.  The end results, though, are met with expressions like this:

I love the contrast.  And I wish I had a pair of Batman pants.

You nice people

I know I've been remiss about not mentioning my previous post on asking people who don't comment often to pipe up and say a few words.  I wanted to thank you for doing so; it's a lot of fun to know that there are people who I know through the blog that I've never met.  Pretty cool.  Mike mentioned that he had trouble commenting, and I wanted to say that I think that's a Blogger thing.  I often have to resubmit a comment 2-3 times for it to stick, and that's what I would try here if your comment doesn't go through the first time.  If I don't have the word verification on, then I open the comments up to spammers and we don't need to see those kinds of ads.  I had comment moderation on for a while, but forgot to check it, and Blogger held the comments until I remembered to check for them, so I turned it off.  Anyone who does the word verification thingy should be able to comment, so feel free to try.  Or not, I'm glad you're here.

Having a kid-free weekend coming up, I've been looking for things to do, and found something for a couple of weeks from now.  There's a group in town called Art Lab, dedicated to making art more accessible to everybody, a message I can certainly get behind.  They have this cool idea, called Art Lab Supper Club, where they have something like 50 people buy a $15 ticket for dinner, which is donated.  We'll listen to pitches made by local artists who need money to accomplish their projects, and at the end of the evening vote to determine who gets the ticket money from the night.  My friend D and I will go.  I love that kind of stuff.  I actually have a bit of an idea that I would pitch, and will talk to someone that night to see if it might be a contender at a future Supper.  It's not for me to make art, but to bring something in so others could sell their art. 

Oh, and I've been knitting.  I have a really neat scarf that I forgot to take a picture of, but will do that soon, and also have started another Leisl.  This time I am making the next size up, as my last one was too small (a heartbreak, but I'm going to give it to someone instead of ripping it out).  I'm also using two strands of yarn held together, on the big needles again, so it will have some heft to it, but be lacy, and also (this is a big part) use up yarn I've got on hand.  You'd think that wouldn't be a big deal, but it's actually hard to match a pattern you really like to yarn you already have.  It seems best to go the other way; see a pattern you like, then buy the yarn.  But yarn is so seductive - pretty, soft, full of promise, and people buy it just knowing they'll be able to do something with it.  Eventually. But, I like this so far.  A lot.  The yarn is better behaved than the last one, a lot less fuzzy, and this is machine washable yarn (although I probably won't actually do that for fear it'd come undone...).

It's not you. OK, it is.

Tweeeeeeeeet! And that wraps up another round of online dating. Before I leave the micro-micro-microcosm that is Match, I wanted to share a couple of quotes from some of the people that have viewed my profile lately and given me the notion that there's perhaps too many frogs to kiss on Match and I need to spread the word amongst people I know that I'm looking. You know, the old fashioned way...

OK, the quotes, unedited by me.

"I'v been on eHarmony for about 3 months now, and still looking for a woman who can get past the fact that my divorce is not yet final. Not yet a member on Match.com, just testing the waters."

"My passion in life is living in and expanding the Kingdom of God."

"I am just a man, who has seen many things, been many places, and seeks to find someone to share some old and new of each with."

"I wish success and acceptance among all people and I hope the meeting with a girl romantic arabic and understand that Life is a game doomed to fall and enjoy all the times"

The rest of them are all seeming to gel together and no one stands out. Must be time to take a break. And, by the way, the Kingdom of God stuff is all well and good, it just wasn't what I was expecting to find in a profile. Not to be disrespectful, but why bring Him into it at this stage?

I was communicating with two men lately. One is 9, the other 13 years older. Sure, sure, everyone says that age is one of the least important determinants, but here's the thing. Both have children in college, and mine is still too young to stay home by himself. It's a different thing that I don't think either of these people would end up embracing. So the one has stopped emailing, and I just canceled a meeting for coffee today with the other one. I don't know, it just didn't feel right, and I'm not going to ignore that.

I am happier and more content when I'm not on Match. I feel like doing the online dating thing takes mental and emotional energy from me that I should be spending elsewhere. So I'm going to look around and find some things to do this weekend. I'm sorry if you've been reading about my struggles with finding a mate with a big fat yawn. Hey, me too. I'm tired of the struggle. Instead of being optimistic, it feels like so much work. Lopsided and backwards.

However, it's going to be another beautiful day here in CO. I'm working on another quickie sweater that I hope to finish this weekend. The Christmas decorations need to come down, and I have decided to call a handyman to install the darn disposal that is STILL sitting in my kitchen. Another artifact of living alone.

Partial Holiday Recap

We had a wonderful time in South Carolina. Overall, it was a great Christmas and New Years, and I've got the signs of a cold coming on to prove it! The actual travel, after the initial snafu last Monday, was fine. Busy, tight connections, but fine. As I've mentioned before, being with my family recharges my batteries and the time spent with them is worth the hassle. We went to Folley Beach, shown above, on the warmest day. It was still a bit chilly, but so nice to be out there. It's funny how drawn the kids are to the water.

The weather was lovely. We also went to a local state park called Charlestown Landing, but I took pictures with my phone, and am not sophisticated enough to get those loaded onto my computer yet. The camera on my newish phone is really good for posting pictures to Facebook, though. My brothers took advantage of it being New Year's Eve and bought a bunch of fireworks, much to the kids' delight. The picture below shows some kind of strobe light one, and my younger brother is on the right, his girls in the middle, and Mr W on the left, dancing their moves. There were two other groups of people shooting off fireworks in the neighborhood, and it was very nice of the police not to ticket anyone - it was loud at times!


I got a chance (but forgot to take a picture - d'oh!) to see an old quilt top made by someone on my mom's side of the family that several years ago I had palmed off on my SIL. She got some input from experts on old quilts on it, and unfortunately, it can't have a backing slapped on it and be machine quilted. This means... Family Project!! It'll have to be hand quilted, so will start to be worked on by my SIL and my niece, and then I'll take it and work on it for a while. I've never hand quilted, but think that getting this thing done and made into the quilt it was meant to be is a worthy endeavor.

That SIL of mine also saved me gingerbread cookies they had made, and gave us ornaments they had made out of white clay - she's so crafty! She also wrapped and passed along something very dear to me, shown below. After my mom died, my dad had her wedding band made into rings for me and my sister. Three tiny diamonds, along with our birthstone, mine on the left, hers on the right. My brother in law got my sister's ring cleaned up and gave it to my SIL to give to me. To have this piece that was both hers, and has stones my mom wore for 30 years means so much to me. I was very grateful.


I need to get ready for work today, so will leave it there.