Saturday, November 24, 2012

The Secret to My Success (sort of)

We are in the midst of a very laid back holiday weekend, the kid, the dog, and me. We've walked the dog for about an hour yesterday and today, so I sort of feel like that offsets the long periods of being sedentary. I'm also doing a small amount of cooking, housework and jewelry stuff, so am being reasonably productive. I'd feel weird if I got absolutely nothing done.

We went to my friends J and S's house for Thanksgiving this year and had a really nice time. We were picked up as Thanksgiving orphans there last year and I was glad when she extended the invite again because we had such a nice time. Another friend invited us to their family's gathering as well, and I feel lucky indeed that folks would think to include me and Mr W. I did something a little different and bought dinner rolls from a restaurant in town, and they were really good.

In the last week or so leading up to Thanksgiving, I caught myself starting to go down a line of thinking where I was just starting to despair because here I am, alone still, going into another holiday season. It's been almost 7 years now since the divorce was final, and there are times when I cannot believe I haven't found my mate, my guy, my match, my (dare I say it) soulmate.

And then the thought popped into my head to focus on the have and not on the want. As my kid and I both sit in my warm living room, using our respective laptops, having just had a nice meal, I feel blessed, lucky even, that I have a job and my health. Really, those two things make the rest of it possible. I feel that with a decent job and my health, the magnitude of my happiness rests squarely on my own shoulders. So the idea of taking note of what I have (mostly regarding intangibles, but being able to buy my kid a pair of shoes today as well) instead of the part of my life I want to be done and settled, has helped a lot. I feel more grateful than cheated.

I also talked on the phone with my dad and my younger brother and got caught up with their lives. It was good to hear they are both doing well, although my brother got laid off and like a lot of people is over qualified for a lot of the openings. I'm trying to draw him into selling his woodworking stuff on Etsy. You never know, right?

I'll probably do a separate post saying this, but I'm having a sale at my Etsy shop, 20% when you use the coupon code "Holiday".


  1. My thoughts are with you; I did several years of being a single mom and I know it's neither fun nor easy, still, you have a great attitude.

    I'm rooting for you!

    1. Thanks, J. I would say the same for you and the challenges that have been thrown your way.

  2. I get it. No matter how wonderful your life is, somehow it doesn't feel complete until you have a significant other to share it with. I think there's an enormous difference between whining and expressing a feeling of longing. Nothing wrong with that! I work on embracing the concept of alone but not lonely. We seem to be wired to be half of a couple.


Hi, sorry to make the humans do an extra step.