Mild Holiday Angst

It was kind of a strange day today. I don't know where my head was (oh, wait, it was probably on some job classified site, but still) but I totally misread Mr W's interest in Easter. He must have spent the last few with his dad, because I had asked him if he wanted to dye eggs, he said no, so I bought a little box of chocolates, happy with my thoughtfulness. Boy, did I read that wrong. He was very upset that I didn't get him Easter candy, and cried actual tears for a while, although later admitted that he wrung it out a bit to see if I'd buy him a new game for his video game player. They are pretty savvy, but I didn't feel bad enough about it to offer that.

The above events did put me in a bit of a funk, and I actually got melancholy, which is unusual for me. I pined for the days when mom and dad had the holidays all planned out, down to our clothes and shoes. I was taken care of.

But we went to church, and doing that kind of dusted me off and propped me back up. I was hoping to get a little nugget to metaphorically put in my pocket, to help me get some perspective. The minister, who I adore, he's so good at what he does, talked a bit about how you have to have the lows so you can appreciate the highs. You have to know what the bad stuff feels like in order to appreciate the ecstasy of the good stuff. I liked that.

Mr W and I also went on a hike with the dog, and while I thought we'd go just part of the way around this trail, we ended up doing the whole two mile loop, which Sally loved because she got to go wading into the chilly water several times. Mr W hung tough until the last 1/4 mile or so, but still persevered. 

I called my family, my dad, and each of my brothers, and got to speak with my dad for a bit. I had let him know about my job situation via email, and he said the funniest things, which I got a lot of comfort from. It was like he was in my head, and said the stuff I needed to hear. He said he had talked with God about the job thing, and that it was all going to work out. Better than I expected, and things would be just fine. Then he went on to say, "You're not alone, honey." It makes me tear up just writing it again. I hadn't asked for the assist, but he gave it and it helped a lot. Later I got caught up with one brother and got an email from my SIL, so touched base with everyone.

Next year, I'll make up the basket, and heck, I'll even hide the thing, and leave clever clues (Mr W's going to regret asking today whether I had hidden his candy. It might be in the compost pile...) for him to work for finding it. He actually really enjoys that, and I think it's fun as well. I was sort of wanting ham, but made a tuna casserole (not the same) because the celery was going down fast.

In the end, it's up to me to make a stab at holiday traditions, whatever they end up being.