When I went through the period from March through the middle of July this year thinking I was going to lose my job, I had trouble sleeping. Not surprising, I think that anxiety over what's going on in our lives keeps a lot of us from getting the rest we need. Then I ended up getting my contract renewed for another year, and that was a huge relief.
I tried what I called a sleep experiment, which I didn't say at the time, but consisted of me taking the sleep meds my doctor prescribed for four days in a row. I think that did help a bit, as I felt like I was sort of in a habit of waking up at 2:30 and staying up for an hour. In the end, I do think that helped reset my clock.
However, it hasn't been until I've taken my profile offline and taken a break from online dating (Again. I know, but one of these days I'm going to show up here with good news, I promise) that good sleep has found its way back to me. I've also had a couple of instances where I'm aware that I'm dreaming, which is unusual for me. This morning, when the alarm went off, I had been dreaming I was in a room with some people, thought of my brother J, and there he was. I said something like, "let's see if we can get something else to show up, but nothing scary, OK?" I thought about an ice cream sundae (you see where my priorities are). And all of the sudden, there was a glob of whipped cream on the clock radio. The alarm went off shortly after.
The last two nights have felt good and normal in terms of sleep, and I feel relieved about it, but also a little peeved that I haven't been able to harness the peace of mind I need to sleep well when times aren't as good. I think I still need to learn to meditate, or do something that I can get some practice clearing my mind for short periods of time.
I'm really thankful to be in this spot. Prince Charming, you'll know me by the big happy grin on my face.